The Role Of The Client Advocate
We were in the middle of our session with my client Patricia Blassie in a gorgeous downtown Miami condo. Patricia has an incredible story. Her brother Michael was a fighter pilot who was killed in Vietnam, but his remains were never found. Patricia led her family through a 25 year journey to bring Michael home. Patricia was very comfortable telling the story of her brother’s bravery and sacrifice, but I wondered, “Who is Patricia in all of this?” How could I help her see her own, different kind of bravery in this story? No matter what we tried, Patricia went back to focusing on her brother, and diminishing her own role in this journey.
My assistant Emma stepped in and said, “Patricia, I want you to sit comfortably, take all the time you need, and say three words.”
‘I AM BRAVE’
It took Patricia almost ten minutes to say those words out loud. In the process, she took deep breaths, closed her eyes, even cried a bit. Emma was right there next to her through all of it. When Patricia finally said the words with conviction, she was a changed person.
Even today, every time we talk, Patricia refers to that moment as transformational, a moment that my assistant and Client Advocate Emma created for her. For the vast majority of us, being in front of a camera can be awkward at the very least, and downright terrifying on occasion. And why not? You’re being asked to share yourself in a way that’s captured for posterity and potentially shared with the world, open to judgment and critique from others. What’s more vulnerable than that?
When I first talk to clients, they tell me about their past experiences with photo shoots. Here are some things I hear:
I was completely in my head, so anxious about how the photos would turn out that I had a hard time relaxing and being myself.
I had so much makeup put on my face that I didn’t look like myself at all. I normally don’t even wear makeup!
I wish I could do a shoot where I wear all my colorful outfits, comfy shoes and my favorite jewelry. But I have to look professional, so I have to wear a suit and heels.
I felt pressured to do all these weird poses that didn’t feel right in my body.
I felt like I had to please the photographer and do a good job for them. I didn’t feel like I could speak up. The photographer is the expert, right?
Does any of that resonate with your past experiences?
It’s no wonder that so many of us associate photo shoots with being such an awkward, uncomfortable time that we’d rather just get over with, or not do at all.
But what if it could be different? What if you could have an experience where …
You are completely in your body, relaxed and just being and expressing who you truly are.
You look incredible and professional in photos wearing the things that YOU love wearing every day, things that reflect your values, personality and even your culture
You can advocate for yourself during a session. You have a way to speak up when something isn’t working for you, and instead work with your photographer to find all the things that you’re a HELL YES to
This is exactly why I have a Client Advocate in every session; an assistant who’s trained as a coach and knows how to help me hold a safe, supportive, empowering space for you.
What is a client advocate?
A Client Advocate is someone who assists me in my session. While they do the job of a regular studio assistant (holding lights, moving stuff around etc), their primary mandate is to be an advocate for YOU, my client.
My client advocates are trained in intimacy or life coaching, or similar modality. They know how to stay attuned to someone, notice what’s going on with them, help them feel safe and comfortable, and get them to relax into their body.
Having someone trained to hold that container frees me up to focus on creating wonderful images.
What does a client advocate actually do?
Here are some things your Client Advocate might do during the session:
Open and close the session with some simple breathing exercises and intention-setting
Make sure we all stay hydrated and comfortable by taking regular water and stretch breaks
Adjust your hair or clothes (with your permission)
Notice if you’re getting uncomfortable, tired or dissociated (i.e. “checked out”) and calling a timeout at any point in the session
Talk and support you through any intense emotions that can come up during a session
Beyond all that, my Client Advocates bring their joyful, creative selves to the session, coming up with ideas that help you convey your story better and have more fun doing it!
I don’t want any client of mine to EVER feel like they have to do something just to make me happy. It’s your session and your story. I want you to feel in control.
Who are these magical people!
Here are some of the wonderful Client Advocates who assist me in my sessions (photos by yours truly)!
Crystal Napolitano, NYC
Crystal is an intimacy coach, stage actress and intimacy director in NYC. She brings not only her coaching skills, but also her energy and experience as a performer to guide clients into their body and create a joyful environment for clients to express themselves.
Kelly Johnson, Bay Area
Kelly is a coach and facilitator based in San Jose, CA. In her day job, she helps scientists and STEM professionals from marginalized communities get incredible jobs at top research institutions. She’s also a former professional model who has a keen instinct for the right pose for a shot.
Veronica Funess, Bay Area
Veronica is a coach in the SF Bay Area. She brings incredible levels of embodiment and attunement to clients. I’m always left impressed by her sheer ability to connect, almost read people’s minds and get them to relax
Emma Colangelo, Miami
Emma is a former political progressive organizer driven by pleasure activism, the idea that focusing on our own pleasure is a means to pursue freedom and reimagine the world. She’s an intimacy coach and also a trained performer, bringing incredible creativity and passion to her work.
